I'm so happy to be talking about babies this week! If I'm being honest, I did not always love being pregnant. I still remember sitting in my bedroom after my first child was born, thinking of different tidbits that people had neglected to tell me about having a baby. Or maybe they did try to tell me and I just didn't "hear" it until I was living it. Since that time I have been able to talk to my girlfriends pretty candidly about the highs and lows of motherhood.
Here are some things that "nobody told me" before having a baby:
1. That I would leak. Oh, the leaking! And all the absorbent accoutrements that came with the leaking.
2. That I would shed like a Labrador Retriever four months after having the babies. The shedding, would in turn, prompt me to cut my hair in a moment of haste because a new 'do, I thought, would make me feel better. If only I would learn never to cut my hair in a moment of haste...always a recipe for disaster.
3. That every time I would "leisurely" reach for a magazine after having a baby, those magazines would include at least one article about one celebrity who miraculously wore a figure-hugging cocktail dress two weeks after giving birth. And that each time, I would loathe those celebrities and those magazines for making the rest of us (or rather, a large subset of us) feel like crap.
4. That lack of sleep is no joke. And sleep deprivation will make you say and do awful things and snap at your significant other, even when his intentions are good.
5. That breastfeeding can be hell. And despite my best efforts, and practice, and consultations and bouts with infection, it would not work for two out of three of my children. And that would be okay. And, more importantly, they would be okay.
6. That babies are not robots. And they all respond differently and hit milestones at different times even if we guide them the same way. They sleep differently, learn differently, eat differently and grow differently. I still have to remind myself of this one.
7. That I still wanted to go out and hang with friends and have fun. But life had changed. And the babysitter wouldn't be there to pick up the baby at 5 in the morning after a long night out.
8. That the decisions would stop being about me and start being about us. And that practicality would rule over style. Very few people in their twenties say they WANT to drive a minivan. It just happens. Because it makes sense.
9. That making that first solo outing with the baby would be as nerve wracking as the first day of college. And that even after three babies, I still have to walk away from a cart and leave a store due to tantrums or crying babies.
10. That I might not bond instantly with my baby; I might not feel immediately connected to the baby growing inside of me. But it would happen. Maybe with that first smile! And when it did, that bond would be fierce. And all the other "stuff" that nobody had told me would be worth enduring.
|Not 1/7/13...but the day my daughter was born.|
What about you all?
Mrs. Williams Comment:
11. That's it's OK to do everything with my little one my own way. Sometimes I was so lost in what the books, articles, and what other moms said that I couldn't hear myself, or my own instincts. It took me a while to learn this, but sometimes doing what worked for my little one wasn't written about in some book, it was there all along, in my heart.
Mrs. Gosling comment: If we only knew .. well, actually, it's better to be the dark the first time around. I think that the sleep deprivation is the worst. If you can get enough sleep to semi-function, then you can tackle anything. I don't know how we all did it! Great post!